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|My understanding of the affect supportive families have on an individual coming to terms with their sexuality is that a person is more likely to come to terms with their sexuality sooner if they have parents who are encouraging and open and make them feel safe.
I highly suggest seeing an lgbt friendly therapist to help you sort out your feelings. You can find one at any local lgbt support center. You may need to go to the closest big city.
Sad to hear you are deciding to go back into the closet. But - we all have to deal with situations the best we can. Best of luck to you.