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 Posted: 2014-04-25 03:42 pm
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Admin



Joined: 2009-03-18
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Hi.  I don't know why you think you are a horrible person.  It seems normal to me that you would be confused in your relationship.  On one hand, you are with someone who treats you good and is attentive.  On the other hand, it is a huge struggle to be with someone who is not out - and who will not share themselves sexually.  These two issues are the same.  She is so ashamed of who she is in terms of sexual orientation, that she will not tell anyone - and she will not let herself accept any pleasure from you.

This is a difficult situation.  I personally would not be in a relationship that like.  If it were me, I would tell her I wanted an open relationship due to the fact that it will never be complete until she resolves her internal homophobia.  With the relationship being open, you do not have to count solely on her - but you do not have to dismiss her from your life either.  This will also allow her, and encourage her, to deal with her self-internalized homophobia.

Please do not say that you can never be in another relationship and that you are not worthy of it.  You most certainly can - and you are! 

Let her take care of herself, you move on and take care of yourself - and stay open to her.  If you are meant to come together fully again, you will.

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