View single post by cheddar
 Posted: 2013-08-09 06:08 am
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cheddar

 

Joined: 2013-08-08
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I'm glad to see a forum for the LGBTQ community, though I realize it's not extremely active.

I am currently trying to figure out how I identify. I've been confused for a while, but just recently started volunteering with the Pride Society where I live. The experience has been great, but has also brought up a lot of questions. The first day of volunteering I was asked "how do you identify?" This question stumped me and I eventually answered with "he" but it got me thinking.

I am attracted to both sexes, but more towards women. I could have a sexual encounter with just about anyone, but I find the face and kissing to be what sways me more. I have therefor been referring to myself as heteroflexible. At the same time, my whole life I've wanted to be a woman. I've never wanted it so much as to seriously look into hormone therapy or surgery, but I have felt like something is missing. I've tried cross-dressing which I find very exhilarating in public and can imagine myself as a woman, but it's not the same. I've never tried drag, but I think I would enjoy that too. That being said, there are parts of being a man that I really like as well. I guess this would make me gender queer. It's unfortunate that one can't just swap from being a woman to a man and back again, but that isn't possible so this is where the confusion comes in.

Is this something that others have experienced? I find it very difficult to explain this to anyone I know and don't know many people well enough to go into this detail without even having a clear understanding of my own feelings. I'm starting to wonder if I really do want to be a woman more than I want to be a man but am taking the easy way out and not acting on this because a little part of me still likes being a man and if I don't have to make it public life remains simpler.

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