View single post by marshmallow
 Posted: 2012-09-14 03:50 am
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Joined: 2011-05-25
Posts: 217
You are facing a situation which is both one of the hardest things you'll ever do - and one of the most freeing things you will ever do.  You will also learn a huge lesson:  the best you can do in life is to be honest about who and what you are and, in turn, be honest with others as well.  How they respond to what you say to them is completely out of your control.  What you can do is to be patient with them because they need to travel their own journey toward acceptance as I imagine you did when you were figuring out you are gay.  And always remember that they are your parents and just because they are struggling with acceptence, that doesn't mean they do not love you underneath it all. 

That being said, my sister and I came out to my parents together.  We are their only two kids so we knew it would be tough.  We entered the conversation prepared with literature from PFLAG and books so that they would have something to help them figure it all out.  Then, on the advice of my therapist, we left them alone to deal with their feelings.  There were some rough times, (my dad wouldn't touch us for a couple years), but now they treat our partners like family and all is cool.

You are the only one who will know when it is time to come out to them.  I think the best time is when you are feeling centered, confident and strong about who you are. 

You can read around this forum and you will read how others have gone through this.  The more we come out to the world, the more we feel free.  And - you may already have experienced this -  there is a supportive and fun LGBT family out there that you can become a part of. Find an LGBT support center where you can meet friends.

Remember  - there is nothing wrong with you - and this will all get easier.  Keep us posted!  :)


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