My partner and I have been together for 22 years now. We met in San Francisco and at the time marriage between same sex couples wasn't really ever talked about or considered. In fact, being monogamous was not very popular either! As more and more time went by, and the feelings we had for each other grew richer, we decided to get married. Well, maybe, at first, it was for the ring ......
We decided to get married in Vancouver and then have a honeymoon on an Alaskan cruise. The wedding ceremony was so wonderful! In the end it meant so much more than just a ring.
In Vancouver, the first step is to go to the government office that issues the paperwork. We walked into the government office with some hesitancy thinking we would be given attitude or funny looks. It was quite the opposite. The woman was friendly and no one in the room seemed surprised or taken back.
The next step is to have the actual ceremony performed. There are folks there who specialize in actually performing the ceremony - and it isnt' necessarily religious. I forget what their title is. We found a wonderful woman through a friend and she did the ceremony in her home. The words of the ceremony were so beautiful that they brought us both close to tears! The depth and beauty of her words went far beyond the standard wedding vows. After the ceremony we took a cab to the cruise ship and we were off on a wonderful honeymoon. After the cruise we met up with some friends for the Vancouver Gay Day parade which was a blast and compared to the SF one for sure!
Speaking for myself (and I believe my partner feels the same), getting married had an impact on me - even though its not valid in the states. The ring is an everyday reminder that there is someone in my life who is committed to me forever! Thats not to say I didn't realize this before the ring. There is just something about that ring that feels so right and comfortable on my finger!
It was well worth the experience and if it ever becomes legal in Ohio, I'll get married again!
____________________ Life's a piece of s**t when you look at it! Life's a laugh and death's the joke, it's true. You'll see it's all a show, keep 'em laughing as you go. Just remember that the last laugh is on you!
Wow very cool! It's hard in the midwest. I have a friend in Ohio and have been there a couple times and rather enjoyed it. Thanks for sharing... I read so many Christian "statistics" that say that homosexual relationships cannot outlast ten years (how depressing!) I myself am trying to find something monogamous and longterm. Your post has given me hope! Thanks so much for sharing!
I'm glad my post inspires you! I sincerely feel that gay/lesbian couples have alot of the same issues as the hetero couples - it just takes some hard work and stick-to-it-ness to get through the rough patches! I think so many of us get use to the easy exit because we haven't been able to get married so there is no legal difficulties to slow us down when we are looking for a quick exit. We, of course, have some added challenges. My best words of advice -
find someone you truly love (not just looks - love their soul)
find someone who truly loves you for who you are
don't spend alot of time picking apart everything your spouse does/says and don't engage in a huge argument unless the importance level is a 10 out of 10 in seriousness. This takes mastering the art of compromise! always seek fun and treat each other with kindness, respect and romance
and don't ever believe what the Christians have to say about anything related to gays and lesbians! So many of our straight friends tell us we have the most "normal" and balanced relationship of anyone they know....... Doesn't matter if you are straight or gay - it just matters how you interact with others and treat your spouse....