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My Parents don't know.
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 Posted: 2015-10-11 05:03 pm
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HelenElizabeth

 

Joined: 2015-10-11
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Hi

I've been in a relationship with a woman now for nearly 8 years and we live together. All my friends know and I have a sibling who knows but my parents and the rest of my family do not know, (or if they do, they're not saying they do)

When I was first getting together with my partner, my mother asked me at the time, and I didnt even know what was going on myself, so in a confused state, I denied it. As time has gone on, its just got worse and worse and now not only do I think they'll not be happy about my relationship, they wont be happy that I've not told them for so long.

My partner has put up with it for a long time now and I'm starting to lose her. My family occasions/get togethers and christmas are hard because she is not involved.

I dont know how to tell them, Im so scared. Friends tell me they probably know but if this is the case, why havent they said anything? And they still say things that make me think they dont. Id say it was pretty obvious, we live together, go on holidays together, take the same time off, do everything together. But then sometimes they say something that makes me think they dont know. :?

Thanks
H

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 Posted: 2015-10-17 02:42 pm
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marshmallow

 

Joined: 2011-05-25
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We've all been just where you are!  And we've all made it to the other side of it.  It is so scary thinking about coming out to our parents - yet it is inevitable. 

You will drive yourself nuts thinking about whether they know or not, how they will respond, etc.  In reality none of that matters.  For not only your own sanity, but the health and strength of your relationship, you must come out to your parents.  You can not control how they will respond.  Your responsibility is only to be truthful about yourself and who you are.  As part of the process of coming out you can explain why it has taken you so long.

You can't control how they are going to react.  You can be prepared to accept, and be patient, with however they respond.  Remember that they will be going down their own path toward acceptance and it may take a while.  Know that even though they may have a negative response initially, that doesn't mean their love is gone.  They are human and just trying to absorb the information.

Hey, who knows, they may say "yeah, we knew and we're ok with it"!  It does happen!!!!  ;)

Just go into this with strength, and self confidence, and I think you will feel a huge weight lifted off your shoulders the moment you do it.

Let us know how it goes!

Last edited on 2015-10-17 02:44 pm by marshmallow

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 Posted: 2016-05-03 04:26 am
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jd0gg11



Joined: 2016-03-14
Location: Sherman, Texas USA
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parents are more intuitive than you think!

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